apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize