So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
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