so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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