Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
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