haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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