Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
You are a booty call, not a friend.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
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