So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
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