physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
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