you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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