Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize