im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize