so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
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