if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
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