OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
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