Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
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