seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize