After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize