Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
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he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
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I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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