k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
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