so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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