Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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