She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
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