How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize