she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
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