Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize