Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
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