Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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