He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
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