You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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