i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
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