How'd it feel making her break her religion?
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize