so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
His hands were made for my vagina.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Randomize