even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Randomize