Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
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