Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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