so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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