are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize