I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Randomize