i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize