just tell him i said nine months
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
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