I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
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