I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Randomize