It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
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