I should be sponsored by Trojan
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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