i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Randomize