i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
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