Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Randomize