My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize