He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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