you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
splinters make it hard to masturbate
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
he laminated a picture of his dick.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Randomize